Driving provides a sense of independence, liberty, and self-determination for adults of all ages. Seniors, adults with disabilities, and their caregivers have to evaluate the safety of driving sometimes before they are ready to relinquish the freedom driving provides. The Pope Institute Retirement Life by Design™ – Living Well Toolkit 10-steps to Talking with Seniors About Driving will help you start the conversation about continuing to drive or giving up driving, help you reinforce accountability, and help you support seniors, and adults with disabilities in maintaining a measure of quality of life with transportation needs.
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1). Do not wait until the last minute. Talking with seniors about giving up driving can be anxiety provoking. Caregivers should take inventory of issues they notice that could indicate a problem with a senior’s driving ability. Such cues may include car dings, bumper damage, difficulty problem solving, and difficulty moving the leg that controls the gas and brake pedals. One way to get a baseline and to make note of changes in driving ability and safety awareness is to ride as a passenger with an older adult to observe their driving skills and validate concerns.
2). Start with supportive communication. Seniors and those with disabilities may be aware of their functional declines. Whether a senior openly acknowledges declines, they have usually taken note of difficulty participating in routine activities. When your communication style is supportive rather than directive, you may find your aging loved one is more receptive to your input and more willing to communicate daily challenges.
3). Adopt a strategy of collaboration. Family members, neighbors, and friends may also have concerns or first hand knowledge about a senior’s driving ability. These confidantes may also be available to provide transportation support.
4). Make obvious your willingness to help. Many seniors are particularly resistant to asking their adult children for help. Seniors seek to avoid “burdening” their family. By verbally reinforcing your willingness to help and offering assistance before your aging loved ones are forced to ask for it, you relieve them of the idea that they are burdening you.
5). Seek professional assistance. When a senior is resistant to discussing driving, your family may benefit from enlisting the support of your primary care physician, social service professionals, and an elder care specialist. These professionals can help work through the resistance and help your family develop alternative strategies to balance safe transportation and quality of life.
